Those who knock Peyton...Kindly Leave!

Miles From Nowhere

The next person that tells me that Peyton Manning is a choker is going to get an elbow to the throat. I’m not even kidding. Try it some time; just don’t get upset when your larynx is shattered. I idolize Peyton Manning; I even picked what college I wanted to go to because of him. The only athlete I love more than Peyton is Brett Favre, and when they played each other last year it was a dream come true. Manning threw for five TDs and 393 yards, Brett threw for 358 and four touches. I cried with joy.

But that’s neither here nor there.

This past weekend I suffered through an awful Sunday afternoon in which the Colts dream season was ended, and then had to listen to about 300 people tell me Manning can’t win a big game. I hope they all burn in hell. Manning’s career playoff record now sits at 3-6, and he has yet to move his team past the AFC championship game. It’s hard being a Peyton Manning fan. It’s like meeting hot chicks at a bar who want some action, only to have them each leave with another guy because you have an annoying friend with you. That annoying friend is each one of Manning’s team mates who lets him down each year. Yea, Manning wasn’t that sharp at the very beginning of the game, but as the game progressed it was apparent that neither were his linemen or receivers. After the game, a frustrated Manning said that they had some trouble with their protection.

I thought he was being pretty nice about it.

Imagine that you’re creeping up on your thirtieth birthday, you haven’t won a Super Bowl yet, despite being a perennial favorite, and all the media does is roast you for being a choker. I think I would have gone to the reporters and let loose streams of expletives and punched Suzy Kolber after losing another playoff game. No one works harder than Peyton Manning, and very few players mean more to their team than he does. Now he has to deal with the hyenas in the media calling him a “bad leader” and blasting him for “throwing his team mates under the bus”.

Again, kindly burn in hell.

I take it so personally because Manning’s legacy at Tennessee was that of a great stats QB who couldn’t push his team to a National Championship, which happens to be the hardest championship to win in sports. The year after he left, the Vols won the NC with some dude named Tee. I guess it was Manning’s fault that his defense routinely took the day off when they played Florida. I guess it was Manning’s fault that Steve Spurrier owns Philip Fulmer’s life and could out coach him in a game of wallball.

What I love about Manning is the way he carries himself with class, despite obviously being snakebitten. Look at how that f-ing dick rider Tom Brady handled himself when he didn’t feel like his team was being “respected” by the media. Oh, sorry Tom, I guess the 15,000 times they show your lame Visa commercials aren’t enough. By the way, thanks for letting everyone know that you look at porn; we don’t think you’re trying to hide your homosexuality or anything. Manning has never complained about the perception that he can’t win big games, he just works harder to overcome it. It seems ludicrous that this has become his legacy once again. Break out those Dan Marino comparisons! How about the Peyton Manning that has lead his team to the playoffs 6 times in 7 years, is active in the United Way, and funds an academic scholarship at the University of Tennessee. He also helped built the student-athlete student life center, and returned to college for his senior year despite having graduated in 3 and ½ years.

He’ll get that ring some day. The good guy’s gotta win at least once.